IT IS A YES
Scarlet coloured lips, nails and the roses that I took on my hands. Big White gorgeous gown trailed down my path as I kept each step with my pearl coloured shoes slowly.
As I reached the destination, I saw through my light brown eyes his handsome face and took a vow as we put on the ring on each other's finger. The ring was as grip as like we held our relationship so serious.
From that minute, everything has changed. A new life began.
Together, we sort out many problems. Happiness filled in the jar of our life. My business went high, he left his travelling and started to go to work.
It was a lovely life but something was missing, everything started to fall apart gradually.
Our jar of life became empty. We didn't know how to sort it out. So, we shouted at each other to find the reason for this by blaming each other. But we clearly knew the truth yet kept on blaming the other. It was us, we weren’t like before. We changed for the sake of others. We left our identity ourselves to survive in this world.
We left each other. We went in different paths, the ring we wore loosened out. I took my business, he took his travelling.
Days passed. It was like living in a dead life. Nothing piqued my interests. Everything went blank. I was living in a dead life.
Months passed. Same emptiness kept on travelling with me. I felt like I was already dead.
Years passed. Nothing changed.
One particular day when I returned to my home, I noted that the light was on. I took precaution and went in.
To my surprise when I was in that scene, it was as if every brightness came in me and kicked out the dark. I felt my own soul with happiness. It was as if the dead inside me died and reborn with light alone.
I saw him, my ex-husband in my home. I didn't show off my feelings to him.
He said that he will be here for a few days and also mentioned strongly that he needs me forever in his life. I felt astonished by his words.
Ego won over my heart. I firmly said "NO".
He kept on disturbing me during my work time. He mingled with me whenever I went out anywhere.
I enjoyed his company and I loved him as much as he did me. But I was afraid to let out my feelings to him. I knew that if I accepted him now, then however we're going to part away again. And so, I withheld my emotions.
I wanted him to find another but he came here for me and for me only. How I wish I didn't see you again or fell for you again, I thought as I smoothly moved my hands on his hair while he was sleeping.
I am not ready to break his heart again which would break mine too.
I showed no mercy to him, no affection to him. Emptiness only to him. But he shoved all his emotions on me which made me feeble to keep my lips sealed anymore.
I was cautious with his actions. Yet he melted me without using his words but using his facial expressions.
I wasn't able to withhold any more of my emotions.
Once again to fill our jar of life with happiness and make the jar as unbreakable. I took the first step.
He was sleeping like an innocent child.
He said he'll be off soon. So I can't put off my answer anymore. It may be late but not too late to give in what we both want, our life together. And that’s what we forgot about ourselves, our own identity, it was living together with happiness and loving each other.
I smiled as I looked at that diamond ring which I placed on the table with a small note to him. It should be visible to him, I thought and I left for my work.
As I reached the destination, I saw through my light brown eyes his handsome face and took a vow as we put on the ring on each other's finger. The ring was as grip as like we held our relationship so serious.
From that minute, everything has changed. A new life began.
Together, we sort out many problems. Happiness filled in the jar of our life. My business went high, he left his travelling and started to go to work.
It was a lovely life but something was missing, everything started to fall apart gradually.
Our jar of life became empty. We didn't know how to sort it out. So, we shouted at each other to find the reason for this by blaming each other. But we clearly knew the truth yet kept on blaming the other. It was us, we weren’t like before. We changed for the sake of others. We left our identity ourselves to survive in this world.
We left each other. We went in different paths, the ring we wore loosened out. I took my business, he took his travelling.
Days passed. It was like living in a dead life. Nothing piqued my interests. Everything went blank. I was living in a dead life.
Months passed. Same emptiness kept on travelling with me. I felt like I was already dead.
Years passed. Nothing changed.
One particular day when I returned to my home, I noted that the light was on. I took precaution and went in.
To my surprise when I was in that scene, it was as if every brightness came in me and kicked out the dark. I felt my own soul with happiness. It was as if the dead inside me died and reborn with light alone.
I saw him, my ex-husband in my home. I didn't show off my feelings to him.
He said that he will be here for a few days and also mentioned strongly that he needs me forever in his life. I felt astonished by his words.
Ego won over my heart. I firmly said "NO".
He kept on disturbing me during my work time. He mingled with me whenever I went out anywhere.
I enjoyed his company and I loved him as much as he did me. But I was afraid to let out my feelings to him. I knew that if I accepted him now, then however we're going to part away again. And so, I withheld my emotions.
I wanted him to find another but he came here for me and for me only. How I wish I didn't see you again or fell for you again, I thought as I smoothly moved my hands on his hair while he was sleeping.
I am not ready to break his heart again which would break mine too.
I showed no mercy to him, no affection to him. Emptiness only to him. But he shoved all his emotions on me which made me feeble to keep my lips sealed anymore.
I was cautious with his actions. Yet he melted me without using his words but using his facial expressions.
I wasn't able to withhold any more of my emotions.
Once again to fill our jar of life with happiness and make the jar as unbreakable. I took the first step.
He was sleeping like an innocent child.
He said he'll be off soon. So I can't put off my answer anymore. It may be late but not too late to give in what we both want, our life together. And that’s what we forgot about ourselves, our own identity, it was living together with happiness and loving each other.
I smiled as I looked at that diamond ring which I placed on the table with a small note to him. It should be visible to him, I thought and I left for my work.
In the note, I wrote,
"Yes, Again".
CREDIT:
IMAGE - Amelia Barklid @ unsplash